*Fenrir appears on the stage.* Due to budget cuts we can no longer afford four entrance themes. There for you are all going to have to enter to one theme.
*Karade, Yosho, Gohan, and Kiyone enter to Bon Jovi's "Raise Your Hands"
Karade begins to laugh.*
*Shibby dashes in during the middle of the "theme"*
Shibby: What the...??
Karade: There is some stuff in there I could really go off on. "You've
got a massive--
Fenrir: *Clears throat*
Karade: Not that I would ever do that.
Shibby: ...*mutters something about Fenrir being a spoil-sport*
*The five MSTers take their seats.*
Yosho: So what do you have for us today.
Fenrir This one is called "A Saria Story"
Kiyone: That little green haired girl from the Ocarina of Time?
Shibby: People write about her?? She was so... boring!
Karade: And is this a lemon.
Kiyone: Ewww, that's wrong.
Gohan: Why are they called lemons? Why not apples? Or tangerines?
Fenrir: Well, uh. . . Listen, I don't know, now stop asking questions.
Let's get this show on the road.
Shibby: I know! I know!! *waves hand but is promptly shushed* ...-_-;
>A Saria story
Kiyone: It's the title and there are already capitalization errors.
Yosho: I get the feeling we are going to be seeing much worse things than capitalization errors.
Shibby: Pedophile lemons, ho! ...*shudder*
>One day in the temple of sages
Karade: The sages decided to play a "game."
Gohan: What kind of game?
Karade: The kind Fenrir and Kiyone won't let me tell you about.
Shibby: Heh heh...
>in the land of hyrule,
Kiyone: Oh I see how this is going to be. The first fic we went over had random capitalizations everywhere. This one is just going to leave
capitalization out entirely.
Shibby: Mah GAWD, woman! You're gunna bust yer brain if you worry about
little things like that!
Kiyone: But, it's wrong! Back at the acadamy they taught us that . . . *yadda, yadda, yadda she goes on for quite a while.*
>Saria, the sage of the forest,
Yosho: As opposed to what? The sage of the lollipops?
Gohan: I like lollipops.
Shibby: ...I've got the munchies... why don't we get any snacks?? We
really ought to get a contract!
>could hear someone call out to her...
Yosho as voice: Saria . . . I am you father. Come to the dark side.
Shibby as voice: Kill, kill!!
>She wasn't sure who it was or where it was coming
>from. She decided to ask Zelda, the sage of time. "Zelda?" She asked.
Kiyone as Zelda: For the last time no! I don't know where you put your
>"Yes, Saria." "I am hearing a voice in my head that I do not know...it's like calling out to me, wanting me near.
Yosho: I want you! To want me!
Shibby: Considering the story.... that comment is rather disturbing.
>I do not know whether to embrace this voice
Karade: *Hugs the voice.*
Shibby: Awww.... ^_^ *randomly glomps one of her fellow MSTers*
>or just let it pass...
Yosho: Well aren't you going to jump on that Karade?
Karade: Sorry, that's below even me.
Shibby: It IS?? *searches under Karade's seat*
Warum's voice: Oh god, here we go with the visual gags...
Gohan: *Also looks under Karade's seat.* What? I don't see anything.
Karade: Would you to get out from there!
>what do you think I should do?"
Shibby as Zelda: KILL!!!
>"Saria, I have a way we can find out about the voice you are hearing."
Kiyone as Zelda: *Pulls out mallet and wacks Saria.* Now maybe she will
>She waves her hands
All: *Do the wave.*
>and they see an image of a young real life man,
Yosho: Does this mean that they know they are in a video game?
Shibby: ...Fourth Wall, we hardly knew ye...
>sitting there looking at a picture.
Karade: *snicker* and what type of picture was it?
Shibby: I bet he wasn't just "looking"...
>It was a picture of Saria, she looked much different in the
picture than she really did...
Kiyone: Hentai fanboys tend to exaggerate certain body parts.
Shibby: No kidding!
>it was so weird..then they heard the person speak... "Oh, Saria,"
Gohan: Ewwww, why is that guy's hand . . .
Yosho: You don't want to know.
>the voice said "Please just take me
Shibby as voice: Take me now!!
>away from this pain."
Yosho: Are we going to feel bad if this guy kills him self over a video
Karade: Not really.
Yosho: Because we're cruel and heartless.
>Saria began to cry at the scene.
Kiyone: This is a pretty sad and pathetic story so far.
Gohan: You're really mean Kiyone.
Yosho: You sill haven't got the idea of MSTing have you Gohan?
>"You really want to help him with his pain, don't you?" Zelda
Kiyone as Saria: Yeah, I'll teach this little pervert a lesson.
>"Yes, I do, more than anything, but I can't leave the temple of
the sages...can I?"
Karade: My copy of Ocarina of Time must be different from all of the
others. In mine the sages got to leave the temple and join Link at that
party they all had at the end.
>"Yes, you can, you just have to want to help this person with his pain,
like you would give up your life for him."
Kiyone: If she agrees to this I am going to hunt Saria down and kill her.
Shibby: Sounds good to me!
>"And I would do that, too."
Kiyone: *Smacks head.*
>"See, you do have that power to become human, and be with is
Yosho: What the hell did she just say?
Karade: That sentence is quite possible the worst constructed sentence I
have read in a long time.
Shibby: I'm... confused.
>please go now before it is too late!" Saria walks toward the
Gohan: Light? I don't remember a light appearing.
Shibby: Step into the light, Saria...
>and reappears near the person who is sound asleep by now in his
Karade: I guess he got done "looking" at Saria's picture.
Kiyone: And then falls right to sleep. Typical.
Shibby: *raises a brow* Speaking from experiance?
Kiyone: *Nervous* Uh, no, of course not. I'm not like that. I'm not like you.
Karade: Oh, burn. *Hides*
>She took on the appearance of what she looked like in the picture the boy was holding in his arms.
Kiyone: That is one of the most degrading sentences that I have ever heard about women.
Shibby: -_- You ain't heard nothin' yet.
>She gently took the picture from his hands and placed his hands
Karade: In her what!?
Kiyone: Hands, I hope.
>and put her arms around him to keep him close the rest of the night.
When he awoke he was in for a shock..."W-what? W-who are you?" "It's me
Gohan: How does she know his name?
Yosho: Um, magic?
Shibby: Naw, just the almighty plot device.
>...she had looked into his mind for memories the night
before..She held him close.
Karade as Saria inside of Chris' mind: Eww, this is really disgusting.
Shibby as Saria inside Chris' mind: Oh, GAWD... what did I just step in??
>"The girl in the picture you love so much..." "It really is you,"
Yosho: So you wake up and find a girl from a video game next to you and
you have this calm of a reaction?
>as he looked at her, he began to notice more and more how much she
resembeled Saria..."You ARE Saria..
Kiyone as Saria: *smacks Chris* What the hell did I just say!?
>but how did you come to be alive...
Karade as Saria: Well, I'm not alive. I'm a flesh eating zombie, and
Yosho: With crappy lemons, anything is possible.
Shibby: (unenthusiastic) Yaaaay...
>you're just bits
Shibby: Kibbles 'n Bits?
Yosho: And Bacon Bits!
>of game information on my Zelda: Orcarina of Time Game for the Nintendo
Yosho: Well if that wasn't a blatant product plug then I've never heard
Kiyone: You mean we can be pluging products during this? *Starts looking through a bag for stuff to advertise for.*
>"Chris, I saw how badly you were sad,
Kiyone beating Shibby to the joke: Why fic talk like Tarzan?
Shibby: Nooooooo~!! My shtick! *wails*
>and I had the willpower to come and help you, so I did...and I know all about
Shibby as Saria: --your sick fantasies, you perv!! *smacks Chris*
>your pain and suffereing through the years.
Yosho: It's people like this that keep psychologists in business.
>I am willing to help you walk, make the pain go away and feel that
Shibby: Wink wink, nudge nudge!
Karade: Know what I mean. Know what I mean.
>you need and I promise you, you will NEVER be alone again...
Kiyone: AHHHHH! It has begun!
Gohan: Maybe the random caps won't be as bad as the other time.
>"With that, she kissed him on the lips...
Shibby: As opposed to the...?
Karade: Places you don't want to think about.
>"you're my Link now,
Yosho: *Looks around nervously.* Saria, you really shouldn't mention Link as belonging to anyone but a certain psycho fanfic writer. She'll hunt you down if you do.
Shibby: *grins widely* Ah ha... our good friend "you know who" is becoming a running gag...
>and will always be," she kissed him again more passionately, more
Shibby as Chris: *whiney* Stop feeling me!
"You really want to help me don't you Saria?"
Karade: This guy's denser than Gohan.
Shibby: Is that even possible??
>Chris asked, smiling "Yes, with all my heart, I do.
Karade: And with several other body parts.
Shibby: Several? *counts on her fingers* ...Uh...?
Karade: Again you don't want to know.
>Can I...make love...to you?"
Kiyone: *Sighs* Lemon characters just go straight for the kill huh?
Shibby as Saria: (bluntly) No. No you can't.
Karade: No, that would make this the coolest fic ever if she said that, so of course it's not going to happen.
>"You really want to?" "Yes, I do..." She kissed him aain
Shibby: Where's that fanfic-ese translator!?
>passionately...then she slipped off her shirt, wearing a red and green bra.
Kiyone: Why would a girl with a six year's old body be wearing a . . . oh never mind, I don't want to know the answer.
Shibby: Ew... ah! >_< Nooooo!! *thumps head on chair in front of her to
get rid of horrible mental image*
>"I know you like both colors, my sweet, Chris, so I made my bra both
Shibby: AHHHHHH!!! >_< This is so retarded!!!
>She kissed him again and took his shirt off. "I want you to be with me
Karade: *Gags self.* "Sweetie?" What is this guy from the 50's?
>He cries in her arms, not knowing what to say or do...
Karade: Well, he's never had any "experiences" except with those er,
"pictures" so you know.
Yosho: Would you stop with the air quotations.
Shibby: Why, "whatever" are you "talking" about, "Yosho"....
>"I will help you, my love," Saria said, she hugged him tightly to her,
Shibby: So tightly that she killed him, the end!!
Yosho: Yay! *Gets up to leave. Is draged back to his seat by security.*
>then she reached behind her and undid her red and green bra...
Yosho: Okay, you can't do both at one time.
Karade: Unless she grew four arms that is. This is a lemon fic. The
impossible is made possible.
Shibby: (screams) TENTACLES!!! *ducks under the chairs, reduced to a
shivering mass of incoherant babbling*
>and laid it down next to her top.
Gohan: Now stay there, don't move.
Shibby: (recovering) Staaaaay, staaay.... good bra!
>"Chris, honey, do you like what you see?" "Yes, I do, please do more," he tried to smile... "Of course, my love,"
Kiyone: Wrong, wrong, wrong.
>Saria smiled and stood up and took her skirt down her legs,
Yosho as Spock: Captain, that is not a word.
Karade as Kirk: You . . . are right . . . Let us . . . destroy it!
Shibby: Uh, guys...? Maybe you should refrain from the Kirk and Spock
riffs... those two are enough enough lemons as it is... together... O_o;;;
*shudders at the thought of anything remotely Shatner-like in a lemon*
Karade: She's right.
Yosho: Yes. *shudders as well*
>green panties she wore, that was the same color as the rest of
Gohan: *Waves his hand.* Her bra was partly red.
Shibby: Glad to see you paid attention to THAT little detail, Gohan...
>then she slid down her panties,
Shibby: And right out the door! *rimshot*
>she kissed him on the lips, frenching him...she wanted nothing more than
to be there with him for all time...
Kiyone: Sure you say that now, just wait till she finds out he has no job and lives with his parents at the age of thirty four.
Shibby: And in their basement, to boot.
>and she knew that she could...because of what zelda had told her, she
slid her panties down,
Shibby: Didn't she already do that??
Karade: She was wearing two or three pair.
>and was completly naked for him....she didn't care...
Karade: Well since she is the one striping I should hope she wouldn't
Shibby: *grins and immitates cheesy porno music*
Karade: *Dances to porno music.*
Yosho: Sit down.
>she wanted him to be happy and by the way he looked he was
Karade: *Screams* You do realize what that sentence is implying.
Shibby: *pats his shoulder* It's best not to think about it...
Yosho: Diiid sheee nooow?
Kiyone: Yeees sheee diiid.
Shibby: I waaaant myyyyy jooooookeeessss baaaaack....
Yosho: Well we stole them fair and square.
>his right hand and placed it on one of her breasts.
Shibby: Oooh! Are they playing naked twister??
Karade: Hey that sounds like fun. *Looks over at the others.*
>"Chris, please don't be afraid,
Karade as Chris: I've never seen a real girl with out clothes.
Shibby as Saria: There's something you should know about me, Chris...
Kiyone as Saria following Shibby as Saria: I'm here to devour your soul.
>honey...I have never wanted anything more in my life." He cried
in her arms
Yosho: Could it be true?
Kiyone: I think it is.
Karade: We finally found a bigger sissy than Tenchi!
>"But what about your duties as sage of the forest? What about
Karade: *Slams his fist into his other hand.* Yes! I demand the truth!
Shibby: You want the truth? You want the TRUTH!? You can't HANDLE the
>"Chris," Saria said, smiling, "when I came here, the younger
version of myself still in the video world of hyrule became the
older me and is in the temple of time as we speak..."
All: . . . . . *Burst out laughing.*
Yosho: That is quite possibly the dumbest answer I have ever heard.
Kiyone: What in the green hell is she talking about?
Gohan: Green hell?
Shibby: Wheeeee~! *grins moronically* I'm lost again!
>"Really, m'love?" Chris asked "Really, sweetie."
Karade: This guy never stops with the questions does he?
Shibby: Or the SICKENING terms of endearment... I swear, if someone called ME that, I think I'd be ill!
>Saria answered, smiling...
Kiyone: Does this girl ever quit smiling?
>She was enjoying her time with him...
Shibby: Oh, I'll bet they were both "enjoying" it...
>She knew it would never end, because when he mingled
*They burst into song.*
Yosho: Let's mingle!
Karade: And make it well!
Gohan: Come together now!
Kiyone: Yeah let's gel!
Shibby: Sounds messy.
>he would not die because she was a Kokori...
Yosho: *Holds up hand.* She said she became a human.
Shibby: *amazed* Wow... look at all these plot holes...
>a everlasting child...
Kiyone: So we're not hiding anymore. The fics coming right out and
telling us this guy is fantasizing about six year old looking girls?
Shibby: ....*turns green*
>a person who would not grow old... (this is not finished and I don't know if it will be finished because I have no ideas yet)
Yosho: I have several ideas what you could do with it.
Karade: Yeah, you could shove it up your
Kiyone: Don't be using foul language in front of Gohan.
Shibby: As if he's never heard it before...
Fenrir: Well that's all. You can all go now.
*All of them quickly exit the theater.*
Shibby: Wooooooo! I'm off to get st--
Erienna: *interrupting* Shhh!! D'ya wanna get us flamed for drug refs??
Shibby: ....*grumbles and trudges away*